The Whole Truth

Mar 30

2010

I Couldn’t Take It Anymore

by Alexis Neely - Posted in Pursuit of Truth |

On Saturday morning, I woke up and felt like I simply couldn’t do it. I had hit my limit. I could not contemplate the reality of continuing to do everything I’ve been doing and have yet to do. It was overwhelming.

I rolled over in bed and said “Dave, I can’t do it. I can’t do this anymore.”

Then, I said, “I’ve been thinking about it and have to cut something out. I can’t do Dave and Alexis (the business).”

Now, to give you a little context and intensity of that statement, we just enrolled 42 people in a 12-month mentoring program. They are counting on us to help them breakthrough to our Stand Tall & Go Deep business model and get their business on the road to freedom.

And, we hired a very expensive, high level affiliate management team to manage our next launch of our beloved Money Map to Freedom program.

When I said I had been thinking about it, I had really only been thinking about it for the 20 minutes before I rolled over and rocked Dave’s world.  Not to say I hadn’t been thinking about being too busy and wanting to have more time for myself and a whole host of other things.  But, I’d only been thinking about not doing the Dave & Alexis business anymore for about 20 minutes before I told that to Dave, as if it was a done deal.

He really is a Saint.

I LOVE the Dave & Alexis business. It’s one of the things I do that is most gratifying to me. I LOVE the people we mentor and coach. I love shaving years off the learning curve for the folks who learn from us.

But, I hit a wall. And in that moment, just didn’t feel as if I had it in me to keep going and doing everything I’m currently doing.

The lawyer side of my business is in massive transition and growth. LIFT is taking off like gangbusters. As I opened my eyes on Saturday morning, I just felt like something had to give and Dave & Alexis seemed like the thing that was least tied into everything else.

And it’s a testament to Dave that he didn’t freak out one bit.

He took me into his arms and said “Ok, let’s talk about it because I know you really love this business and the work we do with people.”

As we talked (or I should say, as I talked and he listened), I re-connected to my why for the Dave & Alexis business at a deep level. I dropped all my “shoulds” and got extremely present to what I love to do, who I love to be and how I love to serve. And within 30 minutes, I was re-energized, restored and recommitted.

Then, Dave & I spent the morning creating some phenomenal content for the BBM2010 program and I made this video for you about what to do when you are pulled in too many directions to give you some support and ideas for what you can do the next time you just feel like it’s simply too much and you can’t keep moving forward.


  • Sooooo glad you're not canceling BBM! Even more glad you are re-committed! I would have complained a lot if I had to figure out all this crap on my own LOL! Thursday will now be extra-special as I am even more grateful to be able to avail myself of your services. Whoa, that came out creepy. You know what I mean! lol

  • alyciaedgar

    Woo-hoo! I so glad you reconnected to your “why”. I have an ulterior motive ofcourse, as I am enrolled in BBM2010, but I am glad in another way. When we become overwhelmed, lose our way or our mojo for something, when we get it back that connection is so much stronger, deeper and committed as you mentoned above. So we are lucky that you had that moment and that Dave was able to talk it through with you. You are now more ready and raring to go with your brilliance for BBM2010 than before and I for one can't wait to be on this journey with you!

    Kind Regards

    Alycia

  • ckka

    I have been really excited to get started on the BBM2010 and working with you and Dave. You have no idea.

    But as I read about all your coaching, travels, projects, and commitments, I often think, how do you do it all. On top of family? I mean really, that is a lot. If you decide to slow down I would totally be on your side. A little sad, but totally on your side. I hope you made the best decision for you. I hope you didn't make it for us or Dave. I am glad you did, but I hope you didn't Because, after 12 years of giving 150% I started hearing a little voice that said “I can’t do it. I can’t do this anymore” and I didn't listen. It took me a long time to be ok. No work, even work you love is worth mental and/or physical exhaustion.

    But you know that. 🙂

  • alexisneely

    Yes, no doubt something has got to give. I'm working hard to have that something be that the lawyer side of my work can continue on and support the lawyers without my constant attention and focus. It's a great business and I LOVE supporting the lawyers AND I believe the work itself can be set up in such a way that it can continue without me being SO involved.

    Running multiple businesses is not the right answer for me for the long haul, that's for sure. I know that all of this is preparing me for something HUGE and my biggest practice is to stay focused on the present moment through all of it. Consciousness in action. Some days it's easier than others!

  • I understand where you're coming from. I too often wonder how you do it all. Especially being there for everyone constantly. And this comes from a fellow workaholic who has struggled with burning the candle at both ends. You content on FWPI is INCREDIBLY valuable for all of us that are the recipients of your knowledge. But I am AMAZED every time I see your response because I know you have so much going on. It's a testament to your loyalty and commitment. Will the Senior Counsel be able to step in in this area? To sustain your growth, you're going to have to make sure you're taking care of yourself. 🙂

  • kathrynlang

    Anytime life gets overwhelming take a moment to breath before making major decisions. Having a support system like you have can mean the difference between pushing through and plowing under. You took the time to remember what was important and prioritized according to your passion. Following passion can be the best motivator any of us will ever discover. Thanks for sharing.

  • Glad to see I'm not the only one needing to acknowledge that something has to shift. As you know, I hurt myself good enough a week and a half ago that I spent 4 hours in the ER that Sunday. It was hell. And even worse, was being laid up in bed all this time.

    I woke up this morning with a single thought: Something has to give. I realized I was pouring too much of my time into work/learn/office stuff, & not enough into my family, our kitchen, and me.

    Well, the results from the Xrays came after the realization. I have arthritis in an area that makes it pretty painful. So my realization came just in time. You see, as I've revamped what my days will look like, they give much better time to family & self care. And I have a feeling that the time I spend actually working my work, will become MUCH more productive as a result. That, & I'm hoping that having those set amounts of time will help my brain switch off once I'm done so that I can really be present with my loved ones in the remaining time.

    Please take care of you. As moms/lovers/entrepreneurs it is too easy to lose ourselves over to everything else. At least it didn't take a trip to the ER & a week & a 1/2 laid up in bed to see it for what it is. 🙂

  • Michael S. Reed

    Alexis, I had been joking last week for you to take a break so that I could catch up on your blogs, seminars, etc…but I was wondering to myself how you were keeping up.

    Based on what you've shared of yourself over the years with your life, I think I'm beginning to learn a little about you…Driven Driven Driven, Type A, Lawyer, Make a Difference, Always Having to be “On”, and so on.

    Best thing I ever did during law school was to take breaks and watch Friends and Beavis and Butt-Head… because they were what I considered to be the opposite of law school classes. And I thought it was a nice balance…of course I didn't end up 1st in class and end up at a top tier law firm, but I digress…).

    You've shared a lot with your fans and PFLs and CBLs and $mappers – about your life, and your business (x4!).

    But – I hope that you save enough of yourself for yourself (if that makes any sense).

    Chill, relax, be yourself – we'll be here waiting for the next blog, youtube video and next program…(I'm still waiting for you to introduce a Real Estate Lawyer program, but I'll be patient…).

  • Wow! What a great blog. I've so been there and done that before. The good part is that you had a partner who is understanding and calming. I'm sure that's a wonderful thing to have in life. Thanks for sharing your story and I'm glad I found your blog. Looking forward to reading more in the future.

  • And then some..

    Sound like a family re-union hangover

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